Sunday, April 18, 2010

Smashed -19/04/2010


I see another human being
who believes
they are worthless
I can’t
reach across far enough
to give that worth back
my Anger
takes it instead.

no one has time for me
and I can’t wind back those clocks
wind down my worries
that my winding road
is going nowhere
and it’s too much
and it’s too late
and it’s just too bad
Anger is there too
in time to keep winding me up.

there is nothing else left
‘cause I can’t have anything else
that I haven’t already put here
in this room
and when I can’t see a way
then Anger comes in.

When I can’t
make love happen
can’t find love
can’t figure out how to be loved
can’t forget love
can’t forgive it
can’t take it back
can’t make love love me
I can
smash things
I can get Angry
and love doing that.

I can’t help but feel helpless
and help
is not on the way
I think it might help...
so many things I can’t do
I can
be Angry.

has never
not been there
for me.

It never forgets me
it never requires anything from me
never makes me struggle to find it.

I can always be Angry.

But Anger never returns anything back
and where love won’t give
Anger always takes much more.

Anger never stays
always leaves me

So many things I can’t do
I can’t
ever remember any of the above
‘til after
the Anger
leaves me
and I’m sitting here
amongst the broken parts
of what Anger destroyed,

On the way out.




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