The Opposite Of People -29/07/2011

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you can hold
a crowd of hundreds
with more comfort
than carrying a conversation
with one other

you get asked
how you can seem
so confident up there
by people not noticing
the nerves off stage
talking back to them

eyebrow wrestle sweat
the gasping air scratch
hugging yourself
for the space it makes

that knows everything about
you
have told them everything about
you
can't remember umm, anybody's name
anybody watching you

hammering your head
so hard into this art
that it now has it's own corners
to fold needs into
wrists hungry cold
for hands to hold
horny breathing fistfuls
of words unrehearsed
and un-prepared words
more words

words covered with words
in a one sided title fight
one hand tied behind the backs
of claps and laughs
they like you  fuck me
-fuck me-
they really like you

if only you
could be that you
in person or
as a person

you act-modest badly
your performance
of a normal person
is abnormally mediocre
unusual at best

casual conversation
feels like being heckled
or an improv
you're unprepared for
living gig-to-gig
until the show boat spills over
and she just bails out
yet again

because you got nothing
to talk about except...
what you got to talk about

just being yourself
doesn't work so well
for a performer

or maybe this is just another stage
another stage you need to get through

where it's real life
that gives you stage fright




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"We're actors~ the opposite of people."

Tom Stoppard -Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead







-Peace









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